Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Preparing...

Today, Izzy and I met with 2 of her soon-to-be therapists within the school system.  Her birthday is just around the corner- May- and she will be "aging" out of the Early Steps program.  How can my little baby be turning 3?!?
We have decided to wait on enrolling her for PreK-D until August since her birthday is so close to the end of the school year. 
We went to the Elementary school and met with two very nice ladies that watched her interact and do tasks in order to get a good feel of her needs and evaluate her for our upcoming IEP meeting. (it wasn't nearly as scary as I had anticipated.) 
She did great with threading beads, drawing circles/lines, kicking/throwing the ball, tearing up paper- girl can destroy some paper.  We also saw were she still need extra help in certain areas.       
Sister loves people and doesn't tend to be shy- so that has never been a worry of mine.  If she happens to get shy, it will only be for a few minutes and then she owns the room.  She took immediately to the ladies.  Holding their hands while walking down the hallway and then went right to work following their directions.  He favorite word when they asked her if she could do something- Yep!
I have never been worried about her doing well within the program.  She has been going to daycare since she was 6 weeks old so she is used to structure and playing with her peers.  So, I can't figure out why I am so sad today.   She did awesome and I couldn't be more proud... but my heart hurts.   
My heart hurts and it is heavy.  I didn't want to leave her today.  I felt like I needed to hold on to her a little longer than usual. 
I know she has been so protected by our family, friends and then daycare.  Being in the school system can be exciting yet scary.  Will she be accepted??  Will she get the attention she needs???  Will kids make fun of her??  Will she________??  It can just go on and on.
I guess this can really be a fear for all of my kids but so much more for Izzy.  I don't want her to struggle and I want to protect her.  But I know she will have struggles and I can't protect her from everything.  I know she is so much stronger than I ever imagined.  She has overcome so much already in her short little life.  But... knowing that I can't be there to protect her from the world is scary. 
I wish the world would learn that everyone is different and that is ok.  People have come so far and are so much more accepting of differences now than before but we still have so far to go. 

This little girl doesn't see differences... she just sees you!  I strive everyday to be more like her.

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