Wednesday, March 21, 2012

A special day...

World Down Syndrome Day
Isabelle Claire... today, I celebrate your life and your special designer genes.  We are blessed to have you in our lives and can't imagine life without you now.  Because of you, I love a little stronger, judge less and am thankful for the little things in life.  Thank you for helping me become a better person.  Each day, you teach me new things.  I have learned things I don't quite like about myself and now I strive to change those things but I have also learned things I never knew I could do or handle. 

I am learning not to worry about tomorrow or years from now and just focus on each day.  If/when I worry about tomorrow, I lose my joy for today.

I worried about your birth but we both made it through.  Then I worried about your open heart surgery and again you amazed me and became my little hero.  You are such a strong girl. 

These past 10 months (almost) have been great although sprinkled with a few rough days.  Your Daddy told me something a few days ago that was so simple but exactly what I needed to hear.  He said- it is time for you to forgive yourself. 
When I found out about your diagnosis and your heart defect I went through so many different emotions.  Some are hard to admit - the fear, grief, worry and many more.  I felt guilty for quite some time for these emotions and never could quite grasp how I loved you so much but still couldn't come to grips with your diagnosis.  So today, I choose to begin the process of forgiving myself.  I will no longer allow these emotions to hold me back.   
You are perfect in every way.  I love you unconditionally- always and forever!

I am so very proud to be your Mommy!  Your life is worth celebrating today and everyday!!

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